My Pyratical days
CHAPTER TWO
There hav been much supposition concern my earlier years specally those immediately after my abduction by pyrates! Certanely my memories of the time are a tad sketchy but recent revoveries of suppressed memory hav helped to piece together a bit of those days. It turned out that the evil pyrates had nabbed me in hopes of replacing the ships cat what had got run over by a gravel truck or some such. They themselves were not half so evil as was made out but found the notious reputation good for business and so made out to be more evil with multitudinous arr arr arrs and a grate whaling about with cutlasses and pistols most of which were unsharpened and unloaded! In any case I found myself treated most agreeably with 'here kitty kitty', bowls of fresh cream and much belly rubbing and scratches behind the ears. Of course I was expect to rid the ship of rats - creatures most dreddfull waht took heinous plezzure in ganging up on me in dark corners and threatening me with dire consequences if I dared to interfere with their business. Tho outnumbered by a grate multitude of these evil malefactors in a pyrate ship that was a maloderous rotting warren full of the filthy beasts, in time I grew most abundantly on fresh cream and kind pats and with my superior size and unbounded courage, I vanquished their superior numbers most effectively.
The pyrate Captain was most plezzed but wrack by gilt that he had abduct me from my princly home. Hard to know from which kingdom my young self had come but he finaly do the right thing and leave me off at the next port of call. The pyrates most sad to see me go and so cry and wail when I am going down the gangplank. It was a most piteous site what brought tears to my eyes for I had come to grately luv the fresh cream and multitudinous pats and scratches from the scurvy crew. Still I set about the continuing adventure of my life as the pyrates waved goodbye and sailed off to pillage and plunder elsewhere. Turning my tail on a life of pyratsy I trod off with a stout heart into the dark - dangerous and most evilist streets of Old Victoria!
There hav been much supposition concern my earlier years specally those immediately after my abduction by pyrates! Certanely my memories of the time are a tad sketchy but recent revoveries of suppressed memory hav helped to piece together a bit of those days. It turned out that the evil pyrates had nabbed me in hopes of replacing the ships cat what had got run over by a gravel truck or some such. They themselves were not half so evil as was made out but found the notious reputation good for business and so made out to be more evil with multitudinous arr arr arrs and a grate whaling about with cutlasses and pistols most of which were unsharpened and unloaded! In any case I found myself treated most agreeably with 'here kitty kitty', bowls of fresh cream and much belly rubbing and scratches behind the ears. Of course I was expect to rid the ship of rats - creatures most dreddfull waht took heinous plezzure in ganging up on me in dark corners and threatening me with dire consequences if I dared to interfere with their business. Tho outnumbered by a grate multitude of these evil malefactors in a pyrate ship that was a maloderous rotting warren full of the filthy beasts, in time I grew most abundantly on fresh cream and kind pats and with my superior size and unbounded courage, I vanquished their superior numbers most effectively.
The pyrate Captain was most plezzed but wrack by gilt that he had abduct me from my princly home. Hard to know from which kingdom my young self had come but he finaly do the right thing and leave me off at the next port of call. The pyrates most sad to see me go and so cry and wail when I am going down the gangplank. It was a most piteous site what brought tears to my eyes for I had come to grately luv the fresh cream and multitudinous pats and scratches from the scurvy crew. Still I set about the continuing adventure of my life as the pyrates waved goodbye and sailed off to pillage and plunder elsewhere. Turning my tail on a life of pyratsy I trod off with a stout heart into the dark - dangerous and most evilist streets of Old Victoria!
posted by Mr. Grant at 8:10 PM
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