April Showers

Winter is over at last, whot is a good thing cause I most abhere to have soggy paws all the time, whot is a result of having to venture out in the rain to adress those unfortunate nececities whot plague us all! The Old Fart of late is always on about April showers and May flowers or some such nonsence as raining cats and dogs, as if any cat be stupid enuff to get caught in the rain let alone get dumped out of the clouds with a load of mangey dumb dogs! The Old Fart should direct his failing wits to the maintenance of my litter box so I is precluded of the nececity for trips out in inclement weather. The fool's nose cannot work so well even tho the unpleasant odeurs of previous usages can hardly hav failed to alert him that it is 'high' time for a litter change! At some point it become impossible for me to dig any new hole without encountering a fowl deposit from some former day - what is trewly most disgusing and upsetting for a kultured cat of fine sensibilityes. So I am driven to the reluctant and most unpleasant alternative of repairing to the grate outdoors where I hav to dance akross soaking wet grass to garden plots in the vain hopes of discovering a dry patch of dirt in whot to dig a hole for my morning deposit. Thus those soggy and sometimes worser, even muddy paws! So as I earlier say already, thank God for spring and an end to endless rainy days and cold winds whot add even more tortur to a winter morning sortie!

Now the Old Fart sit on his broken down smelly couch watching drivel on his TV with the stench of that overfull litter box. Me - I will be outside in the fresh air napping on a south facing window sill in warm sun rays and when need arises I shall trot over to Mrs. Ruzniki's freshly tilled garden plot to continue our ongoing battle of the cat poop in the flower beds...har har! In all these years she not manage to catch me and in our battle of wits I always am coming out ahead, tho she live in hope of catching me in the act! Vain hope indeed as the old hag get slower every year and any attempt to plant a rubber boot up my arse probably result in her breaking a hip in the attempt. Still there is no doubt I is getting a tad slower as the years go by myself, and maybe this might be her year to get me - hah!! - fat chance!

Spring is in the air at last! Dry paws and torturing Mrs Ruzniki - could life get any sweeter?